Talking to Tuzzo about girls

Me: my friend has suggested that next time I talk to [someone] I sit down next to her and say as frankly as I can, "So.... what are your thoughts on abortion?"
Me: I'm pretty sure I couldn't do this with a straight face
Me: which makes it even worse

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Me: oh if I only I could turn Leanne into a feminine crusader
Martuzzo: haha
Me: asking out shy boys and making them feel good about themselves
Me: probably ethically a poor choice because she'd just be leading them on
Me: but still

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Me: I just wrapped that tennis racket that attached you
Me: with black seething death
Me: ALSO
Me: EARTH SHATTERING EVENT
Me: Almost screen-shot worth
Me: Ashley is attending an event on Facebook
Me: she actually replied
Me: HOLY GOD
Me: the world may collapse
Me: in other news
Me: the horrible highlights section on Facebook has informed me
Me: that Megean is tooling around on Facebook while actively logged on to AIM and very much not responding to me
Me: this coffin is running out of space for nails