AIM Snippets

Placing the G

2011-06-05T18:16:00.001-07:00

Geph: Tuzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Martuzzo: JEEEEEEEEEEFGGGGGGGGFFFFF
Geph: The G goes after the first name
Geph: and before strings, forces and funks
Martuzzo: and whiz

Rain shapes

2011-03-04T18:18:00.000-08:00

Geph: my window is a starfield of water droplets
Geph: you must have a veritable sky upstairs!
Geph: You should probably romantically slow dance with Jean up there
Robin: my window is water droplets pixelated on the screen
Robin: like a crazy game of rain tetris

Glucos Intolerant Peon Ninja

2011-02-23T18:20:00.000-08:00

Michelle B: i am a yellow belt in karate!! hardcore i know.
Geph: What order do they go in? This is like my comparative rank in forensics, I think
Michelle B: white - yellow - other colors - black
Geph: so you're like the peon ninja in videogames who takes two hits to defeat instead of one?
Michelle B: i almost just typed "f you" but then decided to be nice
Michelle B: hahaha
Geph: :o yeah that would be uncharacteristically angry and probably cause me to offer to bring you cookies or something
Geph: so, what I'm saying, is that intimidation is a sweet deal and I'm a big joke
Michelle B: oh not in an angry way, just in a "ima hurt you and then we'll see about those two hits" badass kind of way
Michelle B: no need to bring the cookies. though cookies are always awesome.
Michelle B: i'm pretty hardcore. in a very not hardcore kind of way ;)
Geph: it could be a double-cross, I had this tub of industrial strength cookie dough sitting in my fridge for about 5 months...
Michelle B: ewww
Geph: we gifted it to my roommate's GF's enemy roommates, so that they could gift it to their monkey's uncle's cousin's avatar
Michelle B: oh, of course
Geph: it was glucos free, but had a heavy nut contingent
Michelle B: enemy roommates tend to have that
Geph: glucos intolerance or they're a contingent of nuts?
Geph: (you should see their flour protest banners)
Michelle B: ba dum ch!
Geph: stop humoring my bad sense of humor :)

Ringing Resistance

2011-01-16T16:21:00.000-08:00

Geph: so wait what's the deal with your rings?
Tarida: wait, what do you mean?
Tarida: the deal as in the migratory nature?
Tarida: or did i miss something?
Geph: yeah
Geph: unless there's another story
Geph: like it's ability to talk to you, turn you invisible, and cause you to run eternally across the lands of middle earth fleeing velociraptors done up like the Greek myth boat man only to find yourself stuck with the totally lame power of heart with a Monkey side kick
Tarida: no that's about it; just that i had to pretend to be engaged at one point because of some dude on the bus
Tarida: but that sounds really pathetic now that i've seen it typed in print :)
Tarida: whoa, you just managed to combine....what, 3-4 movies in one sentence there
Geph:

Outside of my window

2010-11-29T23:32:00.000-08:00

Geph: Oooh I do hope you're doing dinner at 1am
Robin: pasta + venture bros
Geph: You are too cool for your own good I'm afraid
Robin: are you a venture fan too???
Geph: No but people cooler than me are
Geph: like my roommate and my creepy friend
Robin: am i the creepy friend
Geph: Depends, are you outside of my window?
Robin: technically yes?

Happyface Translation

2010-06-30T12:05:00.000-07:00

Grandmother internet and Lesbian attraction

2010-01-13T19:37:00.000-08:00

Martuzzo: what takes ya back home?
Me: grandmother's request
Me: she wants internet
Me: and it's my grandmother
Me: you can't fuck with her man
Martuzzo: haha
Me: she kicks 14 kinds of ass and takes as least as many names
Martuzzo: i wish my parents would beg me for internet
Me: haha
Me: you guys still have dial up at home??
Martuzzo: nah we have internet
Martuzzo: they just dont use it
Me: ooh
Martuzzo: so sometimes it goes down
Martuzzo: and they dont even care lol
Me: wow
Me: ours goes down for maybe an hour
Me: and Matt goes into withdrawal
Me: I would too but I have my backup meds
Me: my phone
Me: I also don't suffer from the WoW affliction

--

Me: so how do I make myself more appealing to a lesbian?
Martuzzo: more girly?
Martuzzo: idk
Martuzzo: feminine?
Martuzzo: lol
Martuzzo: that is my guess
Me: I don't think I'm very feminine
Me: I could wear Michelle's clothes
Me: EH???
Me: (I wish she were here to squeal at that)
Martuzzo: lol
Martuzzo: i will squeal instead
Martuzzo: ahhhhhhlwkhnlk.jheff
Me: haha
Martuzzo: wow i almost spelled jeff there

If only everything were an invention

2009-11-30T00:50:00.000-08:00

Me: So does your coat do anything cool like sprout laser guns or extend a helicopter arm in the back>?
Martha: oh cool
Martha: haha no
Martha: not really just covers me
Me: flame repellent at least?
Me: or brightly colored?
Martha: haha i actually don't know if it is or not
Martha: no its gray
Martha: but its fashionable
Me: aha
Me: camouflage and yet potentially distracting
Me: you can be a walking contradiction

--

Me: Imagine me waving a foam finger about cheering you on
Martha: haha thanks jeff
Martha: you're awesome!
Martha: :)
Me: (see how much work imagination saves me? I totally have my feet up right now. Though I do wish I had a giant foam finger, it would have endless uses)
Martha: haha you're crazy!
Me: dude, foam finger with changeable text - almost as good of an idea as a drainable table or equipping cars with both a happy and an angry horn

This is a pretty ordinary conversation for her and I

2009-11-30T00:48:00.000-08:00

Me: I mean project planning may happen better when hanging from a wall, I've never tried before
Serra: But it is harder to type that way
Me: Talking about real things and eating food, however, is less awesome
But what if I shouted words at you to type from above
Work on my sermanic tone and all
Serra: ....that could work
Me: Hokay so bad ideas aside
Let's jig tomorrow
But what?
Serra: sounds good
but?
Me: Time/place/costume
Serra: Tomorrow, post-7...somewhere?
I'll be in ninja gear
Me: K, I have new pants that I like too much
Serra: no such thing as liking pants too much
Me: Actually proper protocol is to like them when you're not wearing them
Is Ninja practice on campus?
Serra: yup!
at channing-murray
Me: Ooh
I have yet to eat there
And you have no cabbage roll
SO if we want food to be involved I will pay
Serra: :p I can vaguely support myself with hippie food
do they serve in the evening?
Me: One of these days we need to break into the Alumni center!

Talking to Tuzzo about girls

2009-06-10T15:36:00.000-07:00

Me: my friend has suggested that next time I talk to [someone] I sit down next to her and say as frankly as I can, "So.... what are your thoughts on abortion?"
Me: I'm pretty sure I couldn't do this with a straight face
Me: which makes it even worse

--

Me: oh if I only I could turn Leanne into a feminine crusader
Martuzzo: haha
Me: asking out shy boys and making them feel good about themselves
Me: probably ethically a poor choice because she'd just be leading them on
Me: but still

--

Me: I just wrapped that tennis racket that attached you
Me: with black seething death
Me: ALSO
Me: EARTH SHATTERING EVENT
Me: Almost screen-shot worth
Me: Ashley is attending an event on Facebook
Me: she actually replied
Me: HOLY GOD
Me: the world may collapse
Me: in other news
Me: the horrible highlights section on Facebook has informed me
Me: that Megean is tooling around on Facebook while actively logged on to AIM and very much not responding to me
Me: this coffin is running out of space for nails

Tennis and PB&J Time

2009-06-10T15:35:00.000-07:00

Me: we last like an hour at most though
Me: and I'm full of way too much Peanut Butter Jelly time at the moment
Martuzzo: hahaha
Martuzzo: that = energy for tennis
Me: eventually
Me: once the dance sensation reaches past the stomach

iPEC

2008-03-19T20:23:00.000-07:00

[22:02] Casey: HEll yeah
[22:02] Casey: I am alive
[22:02] Casey: AND playing fast and loose with the CAPS LOCK
[22:02] Me: HOLY SHIT
[22:02] Me: He's advanced to level two of Scientology where they reveal the cruise-control for cool
[22:03] Casey: I have no thetans
[22:03] Casey: I either have no thetans or all the thetans
[22:03] Me: So the citizenry has polled, no protested, no postered me continuously to ask you a very important question
[22:04] Casey: yes.
[22:04] Casey: I am ready.
[22:06] Me: oh right right
[22:06] Me: sorry head in the toilet again
[22:06] Me: one cannot resist the swirly
[22:07] Me: anywho what happens to you after they dis-awesomely discharge you from the Americorps?
[22:07] Casey: You mean when I get canned, or when I make it out?
[22:07] Me: Or take over the operation and sell it as the answer to level-three of Scientology
...
[22:10] Me: So not founding an international positive event chain NGO
[22:11] Me: When is your time up?
[22:11] Casey: mid-june
[22:11] Casey: just in time to NOT be able to hit any summer internships
[22:11] Casey: (thanks, asshats)
[22:12] Casey: yeah the IPEC is going to have to wait
[22:13] Casey: until it doesn't sound either like an international oil agreement, or a new Apple-produced exercise device

Ass groove

2007-06-09T16:46:00.000-07:00

[17:56] Me: my mom is all about wasting money
[17:56] Me: it's a huge problem
[17:56] Me: anyway
[17:56] Me: I won't rant about her
[17:56] Me: instead
[17:56] Me: I shall talk about my old computer chair
[17:56] Me: that I love
[17:56] Me: because it's falling apart
[17:56] Me: but it's awesome
[17:56] Me: you can tip back in so many dangerous ways
[17:56] Me: it's like an adventure every time you sit down
[17:57] Laura: heehee
[17:57] Laura: and super comfortable I'm sure
[17:57] Me: it has an ass groove better than Shakira
[17:57] Laura: ....
[17:57] Me: (does Shakira have a good ass groove?)

Final Paper

2007-05-11T20:27:00.000-07:00

Swamy: Sadly, not many sentences escaped my wrath
Me: good
Me: those motherfuckers
Me: trying to communicate
Me: the nerve

Childhood Obesity

2007-04-26T13:13:00.000-07:00

Ishan: anyways, i asked about camping, and you didn't give me a clear answer
Ishan: know this I am very sweet
Ishan: infact I am responsible for most childhood obesity in america
Ishan: so, that should no doubt convince you

Caveman vs. Zombie

2007-04-24T20:23:00.000-07:00

Me: yawn
Ashley: good morning sunshine
Me: I'm trying to figure out which I'm closer to upon waking up
Me: a caveman or a zombie
Ashley: hahahaha
Ashley: thats cute
Me: you're cute
Me: awwwwww shit disssss

Package for Alex

2007-03-30T10:10:00.001-07:00

[12:06] Me: Dood we should ship Alex something funny
[12:06] Dave: like fecal matter in a bag

The New Deal

2007-03-22T13:11:00.002-07:00

Though the depression wrought by lack of blogged AIM chatter has been great, I have no formally relocated the confused mass to its own blog, what you see here. From now on I'll place AIM snippets where they belong. Happy smileys.

Talents

2007-03-22T13:11:00.001-07:00

[22:28] Will: I must say jeff, your web designing skills have grown tremendously over the years[22:28] *** Auto-response sent to Will: I am Finding Neverland
[22:28] Will: Also I'm ranked 5000 out of 500,000 in Battlefield 2142

Unnecessary Cars

2007-03-22T13:10:00.004-07:00

[02:46] Alicia: im not in the market for a new car...and i'll never be able to afford one...so i don't know what it is exactly that im trying to accomplish
[02:46] Jeff: You're becoming informed
[02:47] Alicia: haha
[02:47] Jeff: or falling prey to evil soul eating consumerism
[02:47] Jeff: you decide
[02:47] Alicia: do you know you can get a mercedes for only 30,000??
[02:47] Alicia: incredible
[02:47] Alicia: i think
[02:47] Alicia: im going to ride a bike
[02:47] Jeff: No, but that's about as much as I might be making per year after I start working
[02:47] Alicia: for the rest of my life
[02:47] Alicia: hahahahahaha
[02:47] Jeff: man, helping people
[02:47] Alicia: i know
[02:47] Jeff: what a sweet deal

Katsup

2007-03-22T13:10:00.003-07:00

[14:32] Kristin: hey
[14:32] Kristin: last night i had a nightmare that i kept spraying jo ann with ketchup and couldn't stop
[14:42] *** "Kristin" signed off at Wed Nov 15 14:42:21 2006.

Moving in

2007-03-22T13:10:00.001-07:00

[22:33] Me: you left like 80 things here
[22:33] Jeremy: I do that
[22:33] Me: including a toothbrush and towel and DVD's for your brother
[22:34] Me: I assume this means you're planning on moving in
[22:34] Jeremy: love to, thanks for the invite
[22:34] Me: in response I've stolen a piece of the great wall of china and placed it in our family room
[22:34] Me: so unless you change your name to atilla and marry a hun there's no way you're getting through
[22:34] Jeremy: I must invoke insanity in people...
[22:34] Me: And if you and Jian Wei get married I call I get to be the bridesmaid
[22:35] Jeremy: christ, you can read my mind?!?
[22:35] Me: you left most of that here too
[22:35] Jeremy: don't need it in the working world
[22:36] Me: it will go well with your animal skin suit at the wedding
[22:39] Jeremy: I hope you produce the world's next shakespeare out of all this creative thought

You had a boyfriend

2007-03-22T13:09:00.000-07:00

Me: Well somebody told me
Clarissa: you had a girlfriend
Me: You had a boyfriend
Clarissa: boyfriend
Me: dangit
Me: how'd you know??
Clarissa: i know the song
Me: yeah but wtf

Marxy

2007-03-22T13:08:00.002-07:00

[21:39] Me: hey can you explain why Bourgeois is pronounced Buuuzzzwaaazeee?
[21:39] Clarissa: no
[21:40] Clarissa: that's pronounced "boorjzwa!"
[21:40] Me: and one step up from that, can you pronounce bourgeois with the Spanish pronunciation set?

TMNT and Art History

2007-03-22T13:08:00.001-07:00

Me: So what tidings are amuck with you this fair eve?
Vanessa: i have two papers i have to write for tuesday and my day tomorro is really busy so im trying to get them done but its not really working out
Me: Well you're talking to me/others online - a bit of a conflict of attention, right?
Vanessa: yep for sure
Me: I guess that means there's no question about it - I'll have to help you write your paper
Me: okay!
Me: so what's it on?
Vanessa: the one i havent even started yet is on an article about michelangelo
Me: Aha!
Me: So
Me: Obviously the coolest of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, I think he offers a variety of concepts and themes of [insert discipline here] significance!
Me: Perhaps the sybolism in pizza evident in most episodes, or his childish amiability that helped to keep the group together - or maybe why the phrase Cow-a-bunga needs to be rejuvinated with fresh usage in common conversations?
Vanessa: hahaha thanks for the great thesis
Me: Are you an art person
Me: ?
Vanessa: ya im an art history fan
Me: dear god I'm sorry
Me: Who was the person who did this to you?'
Me: I'll shoot them out of a cannon into the nearest black hole

Running into Churros?

2007-03-22T13:07:00.004-07:00

[11:56] Me: how far are you running now?
[11:57] Alicia: about five miles a day
[11:57] Alicia: maybe today more since its the weekend
[11:58] Alicia: there's a lady selling churros
[11:58] Alicia: right outside my window
[11:58] Alicia: she sounds ilke a cat

Funny bone is connected to the

2007-03-22T13:07:00.003-07:00

Me: Ben if I got you a skeleton would it help you learn your bones better for Med school?
Ben: Who are you planning on getting it from?

Lost Steph's IM

2007-03-22T13:07:00.001-07:00

[03:18] Steph: uh oh, jeff isn't payign attention
[03:18] Steph: i'm going to start talking crazy talk
[03:18] Steph: green marigolds drinking turpentine
[03:18] Steph: mcdonalds is healthy
[03:18] Steph: oj didn't do it
[03:18] Steph: nicole richie is fat
[03:19] Steph: parrots walking downstairs like milking goats
--
[01:26] Steph: oh no he isn't leaving
[01:26] Steph: OH NO
[01:26] Steph: HELP
[01:26] Steph: i'm too young for this!
[01:31] Me: hi
[01:31] Me: uh oh
[01:31] Me: I left to get cereal
[01:31] Me: and your apartment turns into a porn movie
[01:31] Steph: yes hello
[01:31] Me: poke him with a stick
[01:31] Me: ready go
[01:31] Steph: mmph
[01:31] Steph: she closed her door
[01:31] Steph: i can't jsut go in with a stick
[01:32] Steph: he isn't a badger!

Happy Moments

2007-03-22T13:06:00.000-07:00

[03:06] Me: not everyone has quite your zeal for life and compassion ;)
[03:07] Me: but yeah I don't know - maybe it'll just take a little time to chip it away
[03:07] Me: try asking them what their favorite stuffed animals were as a kid or something
[03:09] Me: questions of childhood tend to disarm our inhibitions about current station in life and dissolve self-consciousness about appearance or social standing and the like. Everyone has fond memories from childhood - be it the playground, Santa Claus, grandmothers/grandfathers, or just a Teddy bear we hugged to keep us safe from the monsters under the bed.
[03:11] Alicia: did you just write that??
[03:11] Alicia: or hadyou come up with that before?
[03:11] Me: yeah
[03:11] Alicia: that sounded very professional:-P
[03:11] Me: I wrote it on the spot :)

Abuse Me

2007-03-22T13:04:00.000-07:00

[22:01] Me: Hey
[22:01] Me: flyers
[22:01] Me: I get free printing
[22:01] Me: abuse me
[22:01] * Murph abuses Jeff Ginger
[22:01] Stork: thats dirty
[22:01] Steph: hot
[22:01] Stork: can you get color paper?
[22:01] Stork: like
[22:01] Stork: blue
[22:01] Me: color printing
[22:01] Stork: green
[22:01] Me: or
[22:01] Me: if you have color paper
[22:01] Stork: no no
[22:01] Stork: coolor paper
[22:01] Me: I can put it in the printer
[22:02] Stork: psh
[22:02] Melissa: not pastels, tho
[22:02] Steph: why
[22:02] Murph: pastels for the WIN!!!
[22:02] Stork: WE HAVE TECHNOLOGY FAR BEYOND COLORED PAPER

Sean and Calculators

2007-03-22T12:20:00.000-07:00

[00:36] sean: hey I got a question for you that maybe you could figure out
[00:36] me: hmmm>?
[00:36] sean: did you take 232?
[00:36] sean: well regardless
[00:37] sean: so I know assembly for a few various CPU's including the z80 which is what's used in the ti-83 series (I know it's nerdy but whatever)
[00:38] sean: and I noticed my headset for my phone was a the same size jack as the one on my calc (2.5mm) so I wrote myself a nifty little recording program on my 83+
[00:38] sean: you press record, it records a couple seconds (it only has so much free RAM) and then you can play it back
[00:39] sean: the problem is, you have to make very loud tones into the mic to pick up anything
[00:40] sean: I figure it's probably just an issue between picking up a digital signal when I'm trying to send an analog one but I was thinking maybe if I hooked up this little 9v pre-amp thing I've got I could get a bit better quality
[00:40] sean: the question is, how bad do you think it is to hook up a 9v battery to my calc?
[00:40] sean: haha
[00:41] sean: long story short question
[00:41] me: I think this is like hooking up a car battery to a lawn mower
[00:41] me: a great idea
[00:42] me: (I actually don't know, but if you're not sending charge over anything you could try)
[00:42] me: do you have a bunch of adapters for it?
[00:42] me: and wait, why are you trying to record on to your calculator again?